It's a fact and known for that matter that technology has made an incredible impact on the world overall but certainly has made it's mark on kids. It's shown through money hungry companies producing graphic video games giving false perceptions of consequences and feelings towards difficult situations combined with increasingly broken homes and communities.
I think about this even more strongly today oddly enough because I had a group of 4th graders who were absolutely brutal towards each other. I was at my wits end and actually got pretty "mean" after a little less than 2 hours. It wasn't that they were mean towards me personally, but they were rude and offensive towards each other! I tried my best to stick to the simple lesson plans the teacher had provided of running three different level guided reading groups, one at a time while the others finished daily work and did extra silent reading. This was all supposed to lead up to 20 minutes of "free choice" activities before the end of the day. Well, that was pretty much out the window. Eventually I had had so much of their whiney attitudes, negative language towards each other, thier deceptiveness and rudeness that I had them take their chairs, that were on their desks for the night, off and sit in silence for the last 10 minutes of the day. One girl actually cried...and of course everyone made fun of her, all over the fact that she lost "free choice" time. For you education majors, I did of course take the time once those rugrats were silent to apologize to those who were "doing the right thing" and tell them that I felt bad that they were loosing fun time due to "friends who were making bad choices." :) Still...the girl in tears killed me, but I suppose she'll live. Now that I think of it, one of my 2nd graders cried this morning because she missed breakfast. Well...might as well start and end the day the same!
I was astounded! The teacher had told me "don't be afraid to yell...I have a horrible class" before she left for an afternoon meeting. I had just come from a 2nd grade class that was absolutely adorable and provided me with a fantastic morning experience of cute comments and good work. I initially thought, how "horrible" could this class be? I quickly found out!
So yeah, kids are mean...really mean. Makes you wonder when the majority of the world will feel the urge to make a positive change and start spending quality time with their children playing baseball in the park and rollerblading around the neighborhood. Makes you wonder when families will change their tactics from threatening their children into acceptable behavior into teaching good behavior and why it is good. The world's views are going downhill fast...what are you going to do to counter act?
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
"Everything whats?"
Who in the world writes a book called Everything Poops? I suppose I should ask more importantly, why or who has the time to write a book with that title? I happened upon this publication while I was babysitting the other day and no it's not a joke. Now, I grabbed Dr. Suess, a classic fun kids book to read to the little munchkins while they were slurping away on their gigantic ring pops (given to them by their mother before she left) at 9:30am. One of the girls jumped off the couch and ran to the bookcase where she retrieved this unforgettable read with an even more unforgettable title.
In a nutshell this book has illustrations of various animals and what their waste looks like. Now, this wouldn't have been so disturbing however the lovely obviously altered author of this classic decided to add what human waste looks like and even worse the illustrator drew a picture of a child, on a toilet in the middle of his business. I'm sorry, but there is something VERY wrong with this entire thing. Have you even though of what publisher decided to print this??? OR better yet...how do you pitch this book to a publisher???
Yes, this is the farm family. Now to save you time I will make this short and just for laughs...
In a nutshell this book has illustrations of various animals and what their waste looks like. Now, this wouldn't have been so disturbing however the lovely obviously altered author of this classic decided to add what human waste looks like and even worse the illustrator drew a picture of a child, on a toilet in the middle of his business. I'm sorry, but there is something VERY wrong with this entire thing. Have you even though of what publisher decided to print this??? OR better yet...how do you pitch this book to a publisher???
Yes, this is the farm family. Now to save you time I will make this short and just for laughs...
- I arrived at the farm to have the father (who I hadn't yet met) not even invite me in the house until he realized I was just standing in the driveway while he continued on with a side conversation.
- When I did get into the house I was greeted by two full buckets of baby geese and baby ducks. Cute, of course, but not expected at all. I have no idea where they got the geese babies since they don't have geese on the farm but I'm done asking questions.
- Again, I thought this killer pigs may actually bust through their 8 inch high electric fence and eat me alive as they barrelled down a hill in their "pen" to greet us.
- Likewise, I thought the steer was also going to charge and end my life. A door in the back of a side garage opens up and straight into the steer's pen. The land that is in the steer's pen backs up to the garage and is about 7ft below the garage floor so when you open the door it drops off. After the lovely children showed me the door and all took their chance in the doorway looking at their oversized pet I took my turn and what I saw was a very confused, serious looking, pretty ticked off steer about 10-12ft away that at any point could have easily decided that day was my last.
- Chickens NEVER stop making noise.
- I witnessed a rooster and chicken gettin' it on. Discrete, but disturbing.
- Checkers, the Pitt Bull, is a sweet and adorable dog that thinks he's one of the kids.
- Jumped on a trampoline....with ducks underneath.
- Strangely, the cat and chickens are pretty darn good friends....that's an odd site.
- I tried to take a kids on a walk around their property, however the oldest informed me that he didn't want to go because there were "huge spiders and snakes" on the path. I immediately decided I'd rather not go too!
I've tried to wrap my head around it all however I'm not sure it's worth the effort. I just sit back, laugh and wonder how any of it is possible...
Friday, April 18, 2008
"Is there a test today?"
Ok folks, it's been a little while since this experience but I will try to entertain you in this blog as I have for so many over the phone. Ladies and gentlemen, it's story time...get comfortable.
Friday, April 3rd I was scheduled to teach at Letchworth High School. Now, though I love teaching and having the opportunity to experience as many schools as I can (and of course hanging out with the fabulous Sarah Iacucci), Letchworth is an hour away and the pay for subs is well, less than a full tank of gas after taxes.
So off Friday morning in the glorious Rochester rain I went...to farm land. Now, I'm not a inner city kid by any means, but farm child I am not either. Letchworth and a lot of the surrounding area = FARM. When I originally got the call for the job I was told that the teacher I was subbing for was the Agriculture teacher. Agriculture? was this a joke? Only in Letchworth would they have an Agriculture class. Though hesitant and really wanting to see the lesson plans for the day before I got there I was not about to drive the 2 hours it would have taken, waste a tank of gas and honestly...even with the lesson plans the farm kids were still way ahead of me. So back to the drive - dreary? yes! literally talking to the busses in front of me trying to convince them to turn down side streets? scary, but true! Farms, tractors, random dogs, calf igloos, horses...you name it, I passed it.
So finally I'm there and thanks to the busses and the slow farm children meandering from their houses to them I'm there just in the nic of time. As I walk into the office in a semi-rush I learn that the teacher I am subbing for as a planning period right off the bat and my day doesn't start for another hour. Would it have been so hard for someone to mention that before this all???? Ok, so I'm there and over it. Down to the classroom I go as thoughts of what in the world I'm going to teach farm kids. How to harvest corn? Herd cattle? Saddle up horses? Fix tractors? This was going to be interesting.
Well, I was close. My first period watched a dvd about chickens and laying eggs. Thrilling I know. Sadly enough, the kids were bored out of their minds but I was quite intrigued. It's not every day you get to learn about mass producing eggs, climate control, shortening days to trick a chicken's internal clock, what egg shells are made out of, etc. Did you know that chicken's lay about 240 eggs a year! That's almost 1 every day! I'm sorry...that's like having a child almost every day. Props to the chickens!
Again, another planning period. This at least gave me the chance to read through a test that I needed to read aloud to a class towards the end of the day. I was more worried about making sure I knew all the "farmy" words that might be used in this test so these kids couldn't see totally through me.
Now, I've never known a school to have "educational tv" time as part of a class however, you guessed it, Letchworth does! After completing a reading section and answering 3 questions which took all of 7 minutes, my next class watched tv...and goofed off. Granted it was their last day before a 2 week spring break and I knew they would be a little crazy and there wouldn't be too much work to do, but still...it would have been nice for them to have something to do...even a farm crossword or word find would have been great. Of course there was the goofball of the class who created little paper signs that said "discovery" and taped it over the "Sci-Fi" logo on the tv screen. He apparently though this was funny for like 15 minutes...I found it humerous for about 15 seconds. Sci-Fi is not "educational tv." There were the rebelious girls and then my favorite, probably because I relate to them the best, the girls who sat quietly in their seats, shaking their heads and the goof and the rebelious loud others. Thank you Lord for those girls. It was the only sign that any of these kids had their heads screwed on straight.
"Is there a test today?" is one of my favorite questions. You might as well walk up and say "hey, I didn't study for this test and I'm wondering if I can convince you that I didn't know about it and see if I can take it another day. I realize that this is completely unfair to everyone else but I like the special attention and avoidance of consequences that I really fairly deserve"
Yes, it was test day in my next class followed by..."educational tv." Now, realize that I'm NYS Special Education certified and I'm used to modifications for all different aspects of learning however there was just something weird when I sent 5 students to the Learning Center for modifications (most likely getting the test read aloud) and only had 6 students left in the class! So one of the girls, we'll call her Molly, was sent to the Learning Center with the possibility that they may be able to establish modifications for her but it wasn't totally certain. Before she left I got a wonderful parting comment that was something to the tune of "Just so you know (I love it when it starts that way), they're going to send me back down." Ahh, love the attitude! And, before I knew it Molly came storming back into the room, "See! I told you they would send me back down!" and with that I blank test came flying, pages flapping in the wind, onto the desk and Molly not so quietly made her way back to seat where she continued to spurt and spudder her frustrations certainly interupting her non-modification needing classmates. Sooner than later she was back at the desk and "I need to see my counselor" came forcefully out of her mouth. Yes, yes she obviously did so away I sent her and again, she returned not too much later asking to write a note to her teacher.
I noticed another girl in the back of the room who seemed to not be taking her test either. I quietly made my way back to her and asked if she was going to fill out any of her answers. This sweet and innocent class rebel went by the name "Ms. ___," I'll call her Ms. Bemis for now. That right there should tell ya something. Ms. Bemis was not about to take or even try to fill out any of the answers. She let me know, so sweetly of course, that her teacher would let her take the test again whenever she wanted to. Ms. Bemis' sidekick who was seated next to her was so trying to resist the rebel urge and actually tried to fill out as much as she could of the test. I tried my hardest to have her at least guess on the few final answers she had blank, but she fell the peer pressure of rebeliousness and giving up. Gotta love it. ...follow it all with "educational tv."
Ms. Bemis actually joined me for the next hour as she and two lovely gentlemen took advantage of my lack of knowledge of regular routine. They spent their "study hall/lunch" hour with me messing around with the wireless computers and printing out papers for what looked to me like belonged in an English class. Ok, explain to me how this farm school...the one where K-12 is in ONE building has projectors hanging from the ceiling hooked to computers so you can play DVD's off of them, TV with massive cable and computers with wireless internet in the classrooms. Are you kidding me?? I know I have been out of school for 7 years, but still.
2 classes more...and they were bound to be interesting. First off, another test but this time I had to read the whole thing to them aloud. Let me set this one up for you. This classroom had lab tables and 9 students which thankfully for them meant they had a table to themselves. Who was in this class you ask? 9 lovely high school boys. What was the test on? Of all things, these poor boys had to have an entire test read to them on the subject of sex. I honestly felt bad for them. Thanks to Ms. Bemis and her ways, she had told some of the boys in this class already that I was "mean" and "made them sit in their assigned seats and be quiet." Riiiiiight...what part of watching dvd's and "educational tv" while allowing them to sit where ever they want was mean or going by a seating chart (which didn't exist in the first place)? Regardless, it seemed to help.
"What sexual organ creates sperm that travels....?" ooooh the fun of reading that test aloud. Those boys, not one of them, looked up even once until the test was completely over and done with and if you think they got all chatty afterwards...not a chance in the world. You'd think that was it, done and over with and nice and easy however of course there had to be one little catch. One of the boys was called down the the nurse in the middle of class for his medications and returned a short while later with a story of overdosing and his eyes rolling back in his head. Of course. But, after that all he was back to finish his test. I was reading aloud the last few questions to him as the others milled about quietly and it came to the end of the test where he had to write out his answers...which he refused to because they were "dirty and yucky" words. Now, you know me...well some of you do this well, and know that I'm not one to actually use technical anatomy terms for whatever reason and ironically I'm crouched in front of this 16/17 year old boy trying to convince him to write these "yucky" words so he gets credit for knowing the answers!
Equine class...last class of the day..thank goodness. 3 girls....yes, 3, total. Their job? SHINE THE HORSE SADDLE! Come on people...I know it's the last day, but lets find constructive projects. Oh, where was the horse saddle you ask? IN THE GREENHOUSE! Yes, the greenhouse which is connected to the school...ya know, the one where they are growing hay, corn, beans...cactus...oh yes, and the one that also has the 4 school pet rabbits (don't pet the bottom one...it pees when it gets excited so tells me one of the girls). I'm glad those rabbits where there because truly the girls had no interest in talking to me over their gossip and well...shining a horse saddle, especially one in such a bad condition as this one, wasn't going to take very long. I had pet rabbits when I was younger. My parents were shocked when their little "won't speak a word to anyone but family" daughter picked up the phone and called an add in the paper for a rabbit. Hey, their the ones who said if I called I could have it. They obviously didn't know how much I wanted this rabbit...they soon found out. So yes, I went back to my days of fluffy bunnies while in the greenhouse watching over my class of three.
So full circle Agriculture came with some random Bio in the middle. You really do have to remember to laugh through it all and look for the light at the end of the tunnel...and sometimes in the lights of oncoming cars for some inspiration :) I gotta little Iacucci time afterwards and life was grand. There is certainly something in the water out there in farm country...and it's not something I would suggest drinking!
Friday, April 3rd I was scheduled to teach at Letchworth High School. Now, though I love teaching and having the opportunity to experience as many schools as I can (and of course hanging out with the fabulous Sarah Iacucci), Letchworth is an hour away and the pay for subs is well, less than a full tank of gas after taxes.
So off Friday morning in the glorious Rochester rain I went...to farm land. Now, I'm not a inner city kid by any means, but farm child I am not either. Letchworth and a lot of the surrounding area = FARM. When I originally got the call for the job I was told that the teacher I was subbing for was the Agriculture teacher. Agriculture? was this a joke? Only in Letchworth would they have an Agriculture class. Though hesitant and really wanting to see the lesson plans for the day before I got there I was not about to drive the 2 hours it would have taken, waste a tank of gas and honestly...even with the lesson plans the farm kids were still way ahead of me. So back to the drive - dreary? yes! literally talking to the busses in front of me trying to convince them to turn down side streets? scary, but true! Farms, tractors, random dogs, calf igloos, horses...you name it, I passed it.
So finally I'm there and thanks to the busses and the slow farm children meandering from their houses to them I'm there just in the nic of time. As I walk into the office in a semi-rush I learn that the teacher I am subbing for as a planning period right off the bat and my day doesn't start for another hour. Would it have been so hard for someone to mention that before this all???? Ok, so I'm there and over it. Down to the classroom I go as thoughts of what in the world I'm going to teach farm kids. How to harvest corn? Herd cattle? Saddle up horses? Fix tractors? This was going to be interesting.
Well, I was close. My first period watched a dvd about chickens and laying eggs. Thrilling I know. Sadly enough, the kids were bored out of their minds but I was quite intrigued. It's not every day you get to learn about mass producing eggs, climate control, shortening days to trick a chicken's internal clock, what egg shells are made out of, etc. Did you know that chicken's lay about 240 eggs a year! That's almost 1 every day! I'm sorry...that's like having a child almost every day. Props to the chickens!
Again, another planning period. This at least gave me the chance to read through a test that I needed to read aloud to a class towards the end of the day. I was more worried about making sure I knew all the "farmy" words that might be used in this test so these kids couldn't see totally through me.
Now, I've never known a school to have "educational tv" time as part of a class however, you guessed it, Letchworth does! After completing a reading section and answering 3 questions which took all of 7 minutes, my next class watched tv...and goofed off. Granted it was their last day before a 2 week spring break and I knew they would be a little crazy and there wouldn't be too much work to do, but still...it would have been nice for them to have something to do...even a farm crossword or word find would have been great. Of course there was the goofball of the class who created little paper signs that said "discovery" and taped it over the "Sci-Fi" logo on the tv screen. He apparently though this was funny for like 15 minutes...I found it humerous for about 15 seconds. Sci-Fi is not "educational tv." There were the rebelious girls and then my favorite, probably because I relate to them the best, the girls who sat quietly in their seats, shaking their heads and the goof and the rebelious loud others. Thank you Lord for those girls. It was the only sign that any of these kids had their heads screwed on straight.
"Is there a test today?" is one of my favorite questions. You might as well walk up and say "hey, I didn't study for this test and I'm wondering if I can convince you that I didn't know about it and see if I can take it another day. I realize that this is completely unfair to everyone else but I like the special attention and avoidance of consequences that I really fairly deserve"
Yes, it was test day in my next class followed by..."educational tv." Now, realize that I'm NYS Special Education certified and I'm used to modifications for all different aspects of learning however there was just something weird when I sent 5 students to the Learning Center for modifications (most likely getting the test read aloud) and only had 6 students left in the class! So one of the girls, we'll call her Molly, was sent to the Learning Center with the possibility that they may be able to establish modifications for her but it wasn't totally certain. Before she left I got a wonderful parting comment that was something to the tune of "Just so you know (I love it when it starts that way), they're going to send me back down." Ahh, love the attitude! And, before I knew it Molly came storming back into the room, "See! I told you they would send me back down!" and with that I blank test came flying, pages flapping in the wind, onto the desk and Molly not so quietly made her way back to seat where she continued to spurt and spudder her frustrations certainly interupting her non-modification needing classmates. Sooner than later she was back at the desk and "I need to see my counselor" came forcefully out of her mouth. Yes, yes she obviously did so away I sent her and again, she returned not too much later asking to write a note to her teacher.
I noticed another girl in the back of the room who seemed to not be taking her test either. I quietly made my way back to her and asked if she was going to fill out any of her answers. This sweet and innocent class rebel went by the name "Ms. ___," I'll call her Ms. Bemis for now. That right there should tell ya something. Ms. Bemis was not about to take or even try to fill out any of the answers. She let me know, so sweetly of course, that her teacher would let her take the test again whenever she wanted to. Ms. Bemis' sidekick who was seated next to her was so trying to resist the rebel urge and actually tried to fill out as much as she could of the test. I tried my hardest to have her at least guess on the few final answers she had blank, but she fell the peer pressure of rebeliousness and giving up. Gotta love it. ...follow it all with "educational tv."
Ms. Bemis actually joined me for the next hour as she and two lovely gentlemen took advantage of my lack of knowledge of regular routine. They spent their "study hall/lunch" hour with me messing around with the wireless computers and printing out papers for what looked to me like belonged in an English class. Ok, explain to me how this farm school...the one where K-12 is in ONE building has projectors hanging from the ceiling hooked to computers so you can play DVD's off of them, TV with massive cable and computers with wireless internet in the classrooms. Are you kidding me?? I know I have been out of school for 7 years, but still.
2 classes more...and they were bound to be interesting. First off, another test but this time I had to read the whole thing to them aloud. Let me set this one up for you. This classroom had lab tables and 9 students which thankfully for them meant they had a table to themselves. Who was in this class you ask? 9 lovely high school boys. What was the test on? Of all things, these poor boys had to have an entire test read to them on the subject of sex. I honestly felt bad for them. Thanks to Ms. Bemis and her ways, she had told some of the boys in this class already that I was "mean" and "made them sit in their assigned seats and be quiet." Riiiiiight...what part of watching dvd's and "educational tv" while allowing them to sit where ever they want was mean or going by a seating chart (which didn't exist in the first place)? Regardless, it seemed to help.
"What sexual organ creates sperm that travels....?" ooooh the fun of reading that test aloud. Those boys, not one of them, looked up even once until the test was completely over and done with and if you think they got all chatty afterwards...not a chance in the world. You'd think that was it, done and over with and nice and easy however of course there had to be one little catch. One of the boys was called down the the nurse in the middle of class for his medications and returned a short while later with a story of overdosing and his eyes rolling back in his head. Of course. But, after that all he was back to finish his test. I was reading aloud the last few questions to him as the others milled about quietly and it came to the end of the test where he had to write out his answers...which he refused to because they were "dirty and yucky" words. Now, you know me...well some of you do this well, and know that I'm not one to actually use technical anatomy terms for whatever reason and ironically I'm crouched in front of this 16/17 year old boy trying to convince him to write these "yucky" words so he gets credit for knowing the answers!
Equine class...last class of the day..thank goodness. 3 girls....yes, 3, total. Their job? SHINE THE HORSE SADDLE! Come on people...I know it's the last day, but lets find constructive projects. Oh, where was the horse saddle you ask? IN THE GREENHOUSE! Yes, the greenhouse which is connected to the school...ya know, the one where they are growing hay, corn, beans...cactus...oh yes, and the one that also has the 4 school pet rabbits (don't pet the bottom one...it pees when it gets excited so tells me one of the girls). I'm glad those rabbits where there because truly the girls had no interest in talking to me over their gossip and well...shining a horse saddle, especially one in such a bad condition as this one, wasn't going to take very long. I had pet rabbits when I was younger. My parents were shocked when their little "won't speak a word to anyone but family" daughter picked up the phone and called an add in the paper for a rabbit. Hey, their the ones who said if I called I could have it. They obviously didn't know how much I wanted this rabbit...they soon found out. So yes, I went back to my days of fluffy bunnies while in the greenhouse watching over my class of three.
So full circle Agriculture came with some random Bio in the middle. You really do have to remember to laugh through it all and look for the light at the end of the tunnel...and sometimes in the lights of oncoming cars for some inspiration :) I gotta little Iacucci time afterwards and life was grand. There is certainly something in the water out there in farm country...and it's not something I would suggest drinking!
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
"She fell down the hole!!..."
Again, I find myself laughing and shaking my head as I drive home in a state of amazement. I left my house, on my way to meet a family I potentially am going to be babysitting for, with high hopes and in anticipation for not only meeting with what sounded like a great family of 7, but the opportunity to give these poor parents a night out without children and put a few extra dollars in the wallet. I never imagined having a story like this 90 minutes later...
I was given directions that I was told would lead me to a mailbox by the road with a "long bumpy driveway." As I drove down this road and came upon the mailbox I was not surprised to see the beginning an unpaved bumpy driveway but what I didn't expect was to not be able to see a house. I forged on and pulled into the driveway in which I manuevered my way up a relatively steep dirt hill nicely adorned with a gigantic rut at least a foot wide up the entire right side. I safely made it to the top of the hill where in front of me stood a very old, run down, two story house. I parked precariously on the hill of a driveway and contimplated whether to go to the front of the house which included climbing a few newly added and misfitted stairs to a porch that had the potential of falling off the front of the house at any point in the near future or walking blindly to the back where I wasn't sure there was a door but the family vehical was parked in that location so I had a pretty strong suspicion there was one there.
I chose the back door, and literally opened a door to the rest of this fantastic adventure. At the door stood a little girl around age 3 who's long hair was blowing in the wind and who's face lit up as I got closer and closer. Behind her stood her sister, age 2, who eyes glimmered in the setting sun and behind her...a pitt bull who decided to rush out the door and welcome me with with lots of loving slobber followed by a lab who followed in line. I entered cautiously, one because I didn't see anyone over the age of 3 and secondly because I didn't know what other animal was going to rush around the corner. Fast forward 15 minutes and finally the mother of these lovely children is released from one of those phone calls that you can't hang up on with a very needy older relative and we began our conversation that would shed an incredible amount of light.
We chatted as her newest addition of 4 weeks slept on her lap so peacefully. I learned that the pasture I had driven by on the driveway was home to a steer. Yes, you heard me right. I didn't see a steer but I trusted she wouldn't lie to me about this. I was also enlightened to discover that this steer had friends in a few giagantic pigs, ya know, the ones you see at the fair and wonder how in the world a pig got that big, a good handful of chickens, ducks, dogs, cats and I believe there was one other wonderful animal that was mentioned but honestly, I don't remember. All of that information was fluttering around in my mind just making my eyes squint and my head tilt to the side like a dog listening to it's owner baby talk to it.
After chatting about different things for some time including very conservative views, over controlling mother-in-laws, animals, husbands, money issues, potty training, cleaning habits, clothing trends, college life and so on this faint sound floated from upstairs down to the couch where we were chatting. This sound was the one that made you tilt your head and question what it is your hearing. The question "is that laughing or crying?" was asked and honestly neither of us knew. It sounded much like a child in a closet with the door shut yelling for their sibling to let them out of that very soft dark hole. At the top of stairs came the 5 year old yelling for her mom which sparked her to quickly roll the 4 week old into my arms and race up the stairs.
"She fell in the hole!!...in the hole!!!" is what I was now hearing. Now, when you hear something like that you first ponder what type of hole. The laundry chute was an option...possibly some sort of attic door or something was also an option but I obviously had no idea, I just sat on the couch rocking the newborn and questioning whether to ask if I should call 9-1-1 or not. After some screaming and rustling everything calmed down. It was about 30 seconds later I heard the mother sending one child to their room and herding the others downstairs.
What happened you ask? Well...the oldest of the 5 children and the only boy in the family was on the top bunk bed in the the girls room. He playfully had climbed over the top headboard and wiggled his way down between the bed and the wall hanging on to the headboard with his arms so all you could see were his arms and head. His second youngest sister, the one who met me at the door when I initially had arrived had also found her way to the top bunk and decided play "monkey see, monkey do." Being wedged between the bed and wall isn't the worst thing in the world and completely appropriate for young children, or drunken college students, but what is a semi crucial step is that you are either tall enough to touch the floor or lower headboard or remember to and are strong enough to hang on if you so choose. Well, as I'm sure you have assumed already the girl was certainly not tall enough to touch the ground or second headboard and was too young to understand she would need to hang on. She was literally hanging by her head between the headboard and wall. Apparently this was a "hole" in little people world.
Yes, it was a serious situation, she is okay and I'm relieved I didn't have to make that 9-1-1 phone call. It's not that I mind making that call - I've called them maaaany times while at working at the Y (I'm sure I've very much exceeded the national average for calls made to them) but I'm just glad that she was okay...and I know you are too, even though it would have made the story that much better...and longer.
So, all's well that ends well. We got the kiddos off to bed and then I made my exitus. Try backing down a very steep dirt driveway at dusk trying to avoid the ducks that had found my car to be their new best friend and the gigantic ruts I successfully avoided on the way up. It's a chore let me tell ya.
So yes, just another day in Piperland. Another day...another adventure...
I was given directions that I was told would lead me to a mailbox by the road with a "long bumpy driveway." As I drove down this road and came upon the mailbox I was not surprised to see the beginning an unpaved bumpy driveway but what I didn't expect was to not be able to see a house. I forged on and pulled into the driveway in which I manuevered my way up a relatively steep dirt hill nicely adorned with a gigantic rut at least a foot wide up the entire right side. I safely made it to the top of the hill where in front of me stood a very old, run down, two story house. I parked precariously on the hill of a driveway and contimplated whether to go to the front of the house which included climbing a few newly added and misfitted stairs to a porch that had the potential of falling off the front of the house at any point in the near future or walking blindly to the back where I wasn't sure there was a door but the family vehical was parked in that location so I had a pretty strong suspicion there was one there.
I chose the back door, and literally opened a door to the rest of this fantastic adventure. At the door stood a little girl around age 3 who's long hair was blowing in the wind and who's face lit up as I got closer and closer. Behind her stood her sister, age 2, who eyes glimmered in the setting sun and behind her...a pitt bull who decided to rush out the door and welcome me with with lots of loving slobber followed by a lab who followed in line. I entered cautiously, one because I didn't see anyone over the age of 3 and secondly because I didn't know what other animal was going to rush around the corner. Fast forward 15 minutes and finally the mother of these lovely children is released from one of those phone calls that you can't hang up on with a very needy older relative and we began our conversation that would shed an incredible amount of light.
We chatted as her newest addition of 4 weeks slept on her lap so peacefully. I learned that the pasture I had driven by on the driveway was home to a steer. Yes, you heard me right. I didn't see a steer but I trusted she wouldn't lie to me about this. I was also enlightened to discover that this steer had friends in a few giagantic pigs, ya know, the ones you see at the fair and wonder how in the world a pig got that big, a good handful of chickens, ducks, dogs, cats and I believe there was one other wonderful animal that was mentioned but honestly, I don't remember. All of that information was fluttering around in my mind just making my eyes squint and my head tilt to the side like a dog listening to it's owner baby talk to it.
After chatting about different things for some time including very conservative views, over controlling mother-in-laws, animals, husbands, money issues, potty training, cleaning habits, clothing trends, college life and so on this faint sound floated from upstairs down to the couch where we were chatting. This sound was the one that made you tilt your head and question what it is your hearing. The question "is that laughing or crying?" was asked and honestly neither of us knew. It sounded much like a child in a closet with the door shut yelling for their sibling to let them out of that very soft dark hole. At the top of stairs came the 5 year old yelling for her mom which sparked her to quickly roll the 4 week old into my arms and race up the stairs.
"She fell in the hole!!...in the hole!!!" is what I was now hearing. Now, when you hear something like that you first ponder what type of hole. The laundry chute was an option...possibly some sort of attic door or something was also an option but I obviously had no idea, I just sat on the couch rocking the newborn and questioning whether to ask if I should call 9-1-1 or not. After some screaming and rustling everything calmed down. It was about 30 seconds later I heard the mother sending one child to their room and herding the others downstairs.
What happened you ask? Well...the oldest of the 5 children and the only boy in the family was on the top bunk bed in the the girls room. He playfully had climbed over the top headboard and wiggled his way down between the bed and the wall hanging on to the headboard with his arms so all you could see were his arms and head. His second youngest sister, the one who met me at the door when I initially had arrived had also found her way to the top bunk and decided play "monkey see, monkey do." Being wedged between the bed and wall isn't the worst thing in the world and completely appropriate for young children, or drunken college students, but what is a semi crucial step is that you are either tall enough to touch the floor or lower headboard or remember to and are strong enough to hang on if you so choose. Well, as I'm sure you have assumed already the girl was certainly not tall enough to touch the ground or second headboard and was too young to understand she would need to hang on. She was literally hanging by her head between the headboard and wall. Apparently this was a "hole" in little people world.
Yes, it was a serious situation, she is okay and I'm relieved I didn't have to make that 9-1-1 phone call. It's not that I mind making that call - I've called them maaaany times while at working at the Y (I'm sure I've very much exceeded the national average for calls made to them) but I'm just glad that she was okay...and I know you are too, even though it would have made the story that much better...and longer.
So, all's well that ends well. We got the kiddos off to bed and then I made my exitus. Try backing down a very steep dirt driveway at dusk trying to avoid the ducks that had found my car to be their new best friend and the gigantic ruts I successfully avoided on the way up. It's a chore let me tell ya.
So yes, just another day in Piperland. Another day...another adventure...
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